Why We Should Celebrate Dia de Muertos
My family and I watched Disney’s Coco in the theater, when it came out. Having a Disney+ subscription, it’s a movie that we watch regularly. While before Día de Muertos (Day of The Dead) was a way to remember my deceased family members while celebrating part of my culture, I realize that this year it took on a different dimension.
Honoring The Dead
As a child, my family never celebrated Día de Muertos. As I learned later, its observance can vary based on geography. After I started learning about it, I asked my parents if they ever celebrated it as kids, and they gently shook their heads no. While I remember that death wasn’t something that we hesitated to discuss, it, also, wasn’t something that we discussed in everyday conversation. As I grew older, I would ask my folks to tell me stories about my grandparents and the great-grandparents that I was blessed to have known but don’t remember too well. Through these stories, I felt that I came to hold onto them and could feel them as part of me.
Remembering The Dead
Now, I feel that there's a new dimension to remembering the dead. For most of this year and maybe going as far back as late last year, we have been dealing with coronavirus (COVID-19). If you haven't yet known anyone that has been sickened by it or have fallen sick yourself, then consider yourself fortunate. If you haven't yet known anyone that has passed away, then consider yourself even more fortunate. In my family, we have known people that were either sick or ended up passing away.
In my case, I lost my high school English teacher. In hindsight, it is largely because of him that I fell in love with the written word. I would easily give him some of the credit for my writing. When he did pass, it was hard not going to the funeral to pay my final respects. So, for him, I choose to remember him here. This is my Día de Muertos altar to him. If you watched Coco, then you remember how important it is to remember those that have left us and to keep them alive in our hearts.
Living Out Their Lessons
Speaking for and about myself, it is important to remember my ancestors. I have a particular interest in my family stories. I am fortunate that it doesn’t hurt my parents to talk about these ancestors. I can use those stories to stay inspired and put much of what I face in context. Truthfully, they probably went through much worse. Their collective hard work and sacrifice helped to bring me to this point. The least that I can do is make the best of each moment, each opportunity that I have (been given). Beyond acknowledging them on Día de Muertos, making the best with everything that I have each and every day is what I can do to pay them continued respect and honor.
Sharing Them With The Next Generation
Part of our family practice in celebrating Día de Muertos involves creating an ofrenda (altar) in our house. At other times of the year, this table (that we use) contains photos of our family members. However, around this time of year, we expand it. We add some vibrant decorations (perhaps adding some artificial flowers or paper marigolds) and adding some items that would have meant something to our ancestors. Traditionally, some of the deceased’s favorite food items could be placed on the ofrenda.
This year, we expanded the family photo selection and added my maternal grandfather. Already at a young age, we have taught our son who these people are and told him what they were like. There might be an aspect of his personality or features that resembles an ancestor, which provides a platform to share stories about them. What better way to keep our ancestors alive?
Not Just A Latino Thing
A few days ago, I mentioned at work about the ofrenda that The Detroit Riverfront Conservancy put up for this weekend at Cullen Plaza in Detroit off of The Detroit River. These are in addition to the ones in Southwest Detroit (information courtesy of The Southwest Detroit Business Association [SDBA]). When I mentioned the ofrenda at Cullen Plaza, someone responded about wanting to go to pay tribute to a deceased relative. However, they felt unsure because they didn’t have a “Latin” background. I told them that it’s not just Mexicans that want to pay tribute to their deceased loved ones and encouraged her to go. While the practice of Día de Muertos may have originated in Mexico, it doesn’t mean that people of other cultures couldn’t use these practices to honor their own dead.
Having said this, I do have to call out organizations that exploit the iconography, practices, etc. of Día de Muertos not to honor the dead but to make a quick buck. While I do recognize that the pandemic has created challenging circumstances, I invite them to put themselves in our (those that honor their dead on this day) shoes. Imagine that it was you trying to honor your dead, but someone wanted to use their likeness and spirit only to make money. How would it feel if your beloved dead were exploited exactly like this? For people that take Día de Muertos seriously, it is extremely painful and very offensive when this holiday is milked in such an unprincipled manner.
Making Them Proud
As I wrap up 2020’s Día de Muertos, I hope that as a father, husband and human being that I make my ancestors proud. While neither my ancestors nor I are perfect, some have set great examples to follow. At times, I wish that I could ask my grandparents or my great-grandfather for advice or their opinions on certain matters. Also, I don’t want to forget my other loved ones, especially those that were lost in the last year. When I remember them, I recall them fondly. I might tear up, but, more than anything, they warm my heart. With much of what many of us face right now, I think that our hearts could use a warm hug.
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